I apologize for not following through with my blogging. Its been one of the best/ worst years of my life. My relationship of about 2 years has fallen apart and I am single for the first time in a long time. You know what though, after truly reflecting and thinking about everything, I realized that my ex was probably the worst person I could have been with. Does being single suck? Yes, yes it does. Does being in an unhealthy relationship with someone suck more? YES! YES IT DOES. I never realized it before (because you don't see it from the inside and you never listen to anyone), but it was not the best thing for me. I truly believed that my ex was the love of my life and as much as you love someone, sometimes you just have to let go because its not working. Now, my relationship wasn't a completely terrible one, but it stopped moving forward and we both need to move on. Guess what bloggerland, I learned that I am so much more better off without him! YAY!
I say this because I never realized how much I denied myself from doing when I was with him. There were times when I wanted to do things and I always felt I couldn't do it without him or I had to ask for permission. Now that I am single and dating, I realize these are WARNING SINGS. Please please please never deny your own happiness over someone who will gladly walk all over you. Its terrible. When I started to venture out on my own and do things I have wanted to do, it was fantastic! The things I saw and the people I met, the fun I had! IT WAS FREAKING GREAT! Here's a list of all the things that I did when I realized that I needed to live my life to the fullest:
- went to Emo Night every month
- finally got my passport
- actually learned how to build furniture myself
- went to the gym for my own benefit and not someone else's
- went to as many shows as possible
- watched all those movies we were saving for "us"
- finished every series I wanted to watch without any breaks
- went to the city as often as possible
- finally felt comfortable in my own body
- got that tattoo I have been wanting for years
- FINALLY WENT TO ISRAEL ON BIRTHRIGHT!
These adventures made my year great. Were there times when I broke down and really missed him? Yes, but who doesn't experience that. Were there terrible dates in the mix? OF COURSE! But that's a topic for a different day. Its been quite an adventurous year, and its not even over! Still have about three months left to make even more memories!! Don't worry, I will try to keep writing because realistically it helps soothe my mind. Other than that, ta ta for now!
Love,
Jess
No comments:
Post a Comment